Dealing with sexual harassment
Sexual harassment in the workplace has become a threat to women’s privacy. How can we deal with this problem and what are the effective solutions to deal with this problem?
The first story: the beginning of the journey
The morning is a spring day. A young woman named Zahra leaves home to go to work. On her way to the taxi station, she passes through a place where there is not much traffic. At the same time, a passer-by says an inappropriate word to her while passing by…
Story analysis: What happened to Zahra is one of the most common types of abuse among women, especially young women, which is known as “verbal abuse” in psychology and “teasing” in popular language. Although in this form of abuse, like in other forms, a kind of violence is applied to the victim, but due to reasons such as being transient or not causing physical harm to the victim, psychologically, the person does not pay much attention to it. .
What should we do against Matalak?
Ignorance of the correct ways of managing oneself in the face of this situation can worsen its consequences.
1- Trust yourself. Don’t let your insecurity, self-confidence and self-control be a technical blow. Trust in your ability to get through this situation and give yourself peace of mind.
2- Papich do not disturb! Verbal harassers often come to you when you are alone and in a quiet place or time. In this situation, when you have the least chance to defend yourself, avoid stopping and fighting them one by one.
3- Localize. This group of abusers are looking for sexual attention. If you give them this attention but in a negative way, they may get stronger and cause more trouble for you. Remember, inattention is worse than negative attention. So retaliate by ignoring them.
4- Count only on yourself. If you are harassed in a crowded place, don’t make a fuss in the hope of helping others, because people often don’t look well at a woman who is with a man and don’t help her much. So just count on your abilities.
5- Change your position. Move away from the place where the intruder is and go to a safer place.
6- Ask for help. If the intruder does not stop, ask someone who can help you or the police to come to the scene.
The second story: the path
Leila, a sophomore, is sitting in a taxi, engrossed in her phone screen, when she suddenly feels something tickling her, looks towards it…
Analysis of the story: The disturbance that Leila faces is less common than the position of Venus and is known in psychology as “Friendly Rubbish”. Friendship rub is a situation where a strange man touches the body of an unsuspecting woman and during the moments of touch he imagines that he has an exclusive relationship with the victim.
This disturbance is usually very short because the disturbing person soon realizes that he has to leave the situation. Often, young men create this disturbance and choose tight and crowded places such as taxis, buses, subways, elevators, etc. for their purpose.
What to do against physical assault?
To deal with touchers, do the following:
1- Speak up. Malesh dost intruders are often passive and isolated people who feel that they have power and control over their victim by touching them. If you remain silent, you have confirmed his impression and kept yourself in a position of abuse.
2- Be clear and decisive. Don’t say “I’m sorry, please and…”, but look at him firmly and frankly and warn him about his behavior.
3- You are innocent. It’s not your fault that your annoying friend rubs off, so don’t waste your time looking for the cause in your appearance and behavior.
4- Express your feelings. Talk to a trusted person about what happened and how you are feeling.
The third story: destination
Naghmeh has noticed some changes in the behavior of a certain colleague for some time, but he has put the basis on neglect until one afternoon, while he is about to leave, that person stops him and says irrelevant things…
Analysis of the story: Harassment in the workplace, education, treatment, etc. usually comes from someone who is familiar to the victim, for this reason it has a special effect on his sense of security and trust. Jokes, stories and sexual innuendos, commenting on a person’s appearance, making sexual suggestions, insisting on meetings outside the workplace, inappropriate questions about personal and sexual life, eye-gazing and touching are among the harassments that occur in the workplace. , education and treatment can be established.
What to do against harassment in the workplace?
In the complex but common situation of sexual assault on the spot, do the following:
1- Enduring is not always valuable. Tell the harasser clearly and decisively that you are upset and dissatisfied with his behavior. If you remain silent, he will attribute it to your consent or inability and continue his behavior.
2- It is not your fault. Although appearance can increase the likelihood of harassment, it is usually not the victim’s fault, because this situation happens to different groups of women. So don’t feel guilty about it.
3- Do not play the role of the victim. Playing the role of the victim will make you stay in the position of harassment and the harassment will be repeated to you many times.
4- Hug yourself. After being hurt, you want to ignore yourself, blame yourself and somehow punish yourself for not committing a sin. These actions make you sink deeper into the swamp of despair and become more vulnerable.
5- Change your position. If the dialogue doesn’t work, do your best; Get away from that environment.
* Master of Science in Psychology