What is sexual coercion?

Sex should be done with the desire and consent of the couple, not by force and insistence, this type of relationship is called forced sex.

The expert in sexual behavior considered the interaction or sexual relationship between two people without consent and under pressure as “sexual coercion” and explained the serious consequences of this destructive phenomenon.

While announcing this news, Dr. Eft Al-Sadat Merqati Khoi stated: In principle and in general, when people enter sexual relations, the satisfaction of the sexual partner should be taken into account in all aspects of the sexual interaction process.

Stating that the range of sexual coercion is wide – from verbal to physical-sexual pressure – he continued: Verbal consent is not enough, but following sexual education, it is possible for a woman without any participation or consent, violence or coercion. experience sex

According to him, sexual coercion is seen in many verbal and psychological forms. Its verbal form may be such that the person feels pressured, guilty or embarrassed and finally gives in to the relationship.

The director of the sexual health group of spinal cord lesions of Imam Khomeini (RA) hospital noted: In fact, sometimes sexual coercion in Farsi terms is called bargaining, sexual bargaining is also when the consent of the other party is not obtained.

He added: “Unfortunately, the number of women who have experienced coercion in sexual relations with their husbands for many years is not small among those who go to sex clinics.”

Markati Khoi stated: In the most optimistic case, probably a number of spouses are unaware of this lack of satisfaction of the other party; But in the most pessimistic state, the person unfortunately does not pay any attention to his wife’s dissatisfaction and continues to put pressure on his wife.

He added: Also, sometimes a man considers sex as his right at any cost. He makes his wife feel that she owes him; He forces his wife to respond sexually in front of the support he gives her and the facilities she provides for him.

A member of the Iranian Sexologist Association said: Some others force their wives to have sex with the excuse that you have to prove your love through sex, even though she does not consent. Unfortunately, sometimes a person experiences sexual coercion out of fear of the consequences of “saying no” to their sexual partner and threats.

He said: “Sex education teachings governing societies are effective in the formation of sexual coercion.” According to these teachings, people’s view of sexual relations and interactions is not a social view, but a physical-genital view.

Markati Khoi emphasized: In other words, some people are looking for a means to satisfy their biological needs, and using a spouse as a means to satisfy their sexual thirst can prepare the ground for the problem of “sexual coercion”.

The sexual behavior specialist stated: It seems that women indulge in sex without consent for several reasons, which originates from the teachings and teachings of their teenage years; For example, he says to himself, “If I don’t respond positively to my wife’s needs now; Is he drawn to immoral ways to satisfy his sexual needs? In other words, these women give in to the relationship because of the fear of the consequences of saying no.

He emphasized: Of course, I have no objection to the teachings, but I believe that the teachings should be correct and principled. Let girls and even boys know and respect their sexual rights and those of others.

Director of the Sexual Health Group of Spinal Injuries of Imam Khomeini Hospital (RA) said: In fact, including gender fanatically in the education and upbringing of our children will cause men to find a superior role in sexual expression and statements. While the woman does not learn any cognitive and behavioral skills in the field of sexual interactions and accepts a passive role, the same background can also facilitate the formation of sexual compulsions.

He stated: Therefore, such a woman in her married life may not be able to understand that pleasant and satisfying sex is her right. Maybe he only knows that whenever his wife feels a need, he should give a positive answer and sexual needs should never be discussed between two people.

According to Markati Khoi, if these teachings are taught to boys and girls correctly, the time to enter into sexual interaction without creating any doubts; They enjoy the lack of satisfaction and abuse of their relationship.

He emphasized: In fact, the person who needs to have sexual relations does not care if my sexual partner is ready to have a relationship. Is it satisfied? Is he in a good mood? In fact, at that moment, the person seeks to satisfy his sexual need or sexual pressure and practically does not pay any attention to the satisfaction of his other party.

A member of the Iranian Sexologist Association emphasized that sexual coercion is seen in a high percentage (70%) among non-customary and legal couples (so-called girlfriends and boyfriends) more than the customary and legal relationship between husband and wife.

He stressed that if the couple’s view of sex is a “social view”, they will definitely succeed; He pointed out: Because in such a case, a person with sexual needs first asks himself whether my wife also needs to have a relationship with me. Is he satisfied with this relationship or not?

Mr. Markati Khoi advised: Now, pay attention to the fact that couples should review and think a little about their behavior and sexual interactions; It is very important. In fact, they should turn sex into a social relationship and know that sexual interactions should not happen to achieve personal goals.

He emphasized: If we go back to the families, the challenge is that each of the parties pursues their own goals and tasks; And there is less time to pay attention to the relationship between two people.

He added: “Without paying attention to the joint relationship and enriching it, it is not possible to expect that if a man requests sex from his wife, he will definitely receive a pleasant and appropriate response, while the problem is not with the woman, but the problem is in the relationship that during the day Not made right.

He listed sexual problems such as sexual dissatisfaction, sexual dysfunction, and infidelity as serious consequences of sexual coercion and clarified: Our discussion is not only about women, but men also experience sexual coercion all over the world, a man has sex with his wife. He doesn’t have a very good feeling, but because of his commitment, he lives with his wife for many years.

He said: In order to prevent sexual coercion between couples, the following minimum measures should be considered:

– Identifying sexual privacy and paying attention to one’s sexual limitations and expressing dissatisfaction

– Respecting your rights and health by saying “no” to any sexual coercion and bargaining

– increasing the self confiedence

– Identifying signs of sexual coercion

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